September 5, 2008

DBC STUDIES: Douche-Polar Disorder (DPD)

Hello, and welcome to another chapter in the Douchebag Comment Studies; in which we analyze the behavioral pattern of Douchebags and try to discover what drives them to leave DBC's on our videos... or maybe they're just morons?

However, there are times in which the Douchebag's feelings are hurt and their personality switches from their own definition of "nice," to a more aggressive stance, which could even be considered as bi-polar behavior. This form of douchebaggery is known as: Douche-Polar Disorder [or DPD]. To clarify what the studies of this particular personality disorder reveal, please refer to the example below.

Usually, the first comment of a Douchebag with DPBD is very characteristic: nice, almost friendly tone; misleading; and, finally, they will claim they like the video they are (according to them) criticizing. Also, they usually contain more than two "smileys" or "lol"'s or some variation:

Please note, as it is common with Douchebags, the lack of sense and -most of all- contradiction. In one single sentence, the subject managed to call the video "cool" and "a disgrace." As it was mentioned, note the friendly tone and different kinds of "smileys." When confronted with this evidence (in addition to several more about his douchebaggery), the Douchebag reacted:

Again, the lack of sense and logic is evident. Please note, also, the 180-degree in tone. This message shows an aggressive tone and lack of spelling: also very characteristic of DBC's. "... regarding to the bit where I sayd it was great, I did NOT mean this vid!": this sentence shows a specially low-IQ, since this comment was made on a particular video, and raises the question: Which video did you mean, then? Next, after the subject is once again confronted with the lack of sense of his comment, he goes on to insult the user's reading capabilities:

"... next time read your comments properly..." one has to wonder what the subject mean by that. Also, the other half of that sentence becomes interesting: "... and reply that way to!" The Douchebag mind is a mystery, and, at this point, a lot of it it's guessing, but we believe what the subject was trying to communicate was something like: "Next time agree with me with anything I say, and don't make evident my lack of intellect."

The studies of this particular behavioral pattern are not conclusive as of yet, but it is becoming more and more apparent that this Disorder is quite common among the Douchebag community. Further evidence of this and other studies of the Douchebag Community will be posted here as soon as they're studied and analyzed.

Got a douchebag comment? Help these studies develop! Submit it to: LRRGods@gmail.com. Please include "Douchebag Comment" as a subject. Thank you!